Eat Pray Love: Live Live Live

I began to write this today morning but my thoughts denied the expressive power of an opening paragraph. Then as I tucked myself in bed post midnight, something struck me like lightening. I couldn't sleep after that, so made myself some coffee and here I am with a piece of philosophy - The world is predominantly made up with two kinds of people: the wise and the bohemian. This was that lightening moment.

The wise: I have been given an orientation on the science of living a few years ago. Get married by 26-27, have your first kid by 29, the second by 32. By the time you retire, your kids are grown up and settled. There in a nutshell, wisdom was parted to me. In summary, the moral suggested that all the "agenda-items" expected of you during your lifetime, should be executed at the right times. And I do believe, that to a great extent this works for a lot of people. Some are lucky to find love, get married and live this science very successfully. More often, parents make the match, the love may or may not happen but the entities conform to the science of living through very healthy companionship. Some may not be very happy after a while, but accept it as fate and work harder to be happy in the given situation. Its a very well established proven path for years and this has become the living prophecy. Truth is, it works with defined roleplays and the society on a larger scale appreciates it.

Then there are the species of the bohemians: These people are aware of the wisdom shared over the years; they understand and can comprehend the wise science of living. However their instincts are often guided with the adventure of unknown. The unknown in life or the unrealized of them. And this journey of self-realization supercedes the comfort, security or compromise of wisdom. Liz Gilbert's is the latter story. You will have to walk in her shoes for a while to empathize and relate to its serenity.

Liz is a writer who has potentially made the most of her material success but somewhere in her relationships she has lost touch with her personal self - partly making choices to make a marriage successful and then being a girlfriend soon after the marriage is over. Quite often when some part of your life hits rocky mountains, you take a step back and assess! What the F is possibly wrong? And so on her quest, she decides to take an year off to travel to Italy, India and Bali.

Well, as I walked through the movie with Liz, I was left with a very serene, sensitive and spiritual impression. In very small bits the real Julia shines on the screen, however for majority of the part we are getting to know Liz Gilbert who in my opinion is a very kind and sensitive person. She is consciously working to put the love and lust behind, to understand the person she is without it; probably establishing the balance of her life. The movie does not have any larger than life moments that Julia has delivered in many past performances, however, it delivers a deeper and sublime peace. The message is very profound in its three word simplicity: When you 'eat pray love', you have learnt to 'live live live'. If you are already doing it, then this movie gives you another soul-friend Liz Gilbert and if you are not, this movie may inspire you to find something more about yourself.

The Eat part: The other day, Kirit, a friend of mine posted a status message on FB saying he was relishing rich cashews, something that he is prohibited to do. During the same time, I was munching on two yummy 'besan' laddoos being very well aware that I haven't seen the face of my gym in the past one month. When the irresistible craving for food takes over, you simply want to enjoy the relishing moment without worrying how the calories impact your physical anatomy. The simple plain ecstasy of 'bingeing'. Liz lives this eating joy in Italy coupled with learning the Italian language of provocative gestures. As she leaves Italy, she is served a grand thanksgiving dinner by a local family that she befriends during her stay. As they say their thank you (s) over the dinner table that is devoid of turkey, Liz tells them how happy she is to see the happiness wrapped around her in other people's lives. Even if your life has hit the rocks, on some occasions one can be happy relating to the happiness of others. 

The Pray part: The message she gives herself in this phase is to 'forgive' herself for letting go of her marriage and the hurt she has caused. The other day, Vikram asked me "Do you think I am a good person, a good son?". I zapped out a bit and told him "Well, I think you are a decent friend. However, I cannot justify or deny the good son part. You have to decide that for yourself. If you can be at peace with the son that you have been, then you are a good son. Period." That is the core of every individual. The review you give yourself of the role plays you play in life. The lover, the father, the spouse, the mother and the friend. You have to be happy with who you have been and if you are not, you have to strive to arrive at that happiness quotient. The world may look upon you as selfish or failing or any such multiple dimensions, however you are the sculptor of your own destiny. You hit and hammer yourself the way you deem fit to produce a piece of art that you are going to be content with.

The love part: "If you want to love, love. If you miss someone, miss". Hold not the emotion, feel and live it. I believe, the larger part of the problem is not to love, but to expect the love in return. Are we in some sort of a way programmed to expect this as humans? And is it really worthwhile to unlearn this programmed philosophy and learn it the other way? Truth is one cannot dictate how and who to love, one may only have a temporary capacity to manipulate someone into loving. If you find someone who arouses the feeling, the greater good is to act on it and love. It will find a way to transform and evolve, probably into the greatest love at one extreme or a faded and forgotten story at the other end.

Now, time for another theory. If the world is probably divided into the wise and the bohemians, they probably end up on the 'compromise' and 'loneliness' scales respectively. Count out the people who have found the perfect world of love, passion and happily ever after. However, people on both scales are probably a happier lot with the choices they make. The wise are happy because they make the most of their circumstances while the bohemians try to make the most of new experiences that come to them. If I was not to find my perfect world, I most likely see myself on the 'loneliness' scale. Not either scales are bad, they are meant for people with two very distinguished philosophies. 

Throughout the movie, Liz has been told to find herself a man. The wise did that because they are so ingrained with this philosophy and believe it works. Majority of the times it does, may be. However, may be sometimes we like to try out the new, the unexperienced when the joy of the proven doesn't excite us. The greatest part of the movie to me is the fact that Liz could leverage her friends and use her power to finance permanent housing for a lesser fortunate divorced woman in Bali. That is the legacy of being a great human being; extending your support to make life better for somebody else. That one gigantic deed is probably as worthwhile as making a marriage successful. May be it cannot be equated, but in my world, it is as significant a success story as anyone else would probably credit you for a good working marriage.

While she took an year off to eat, pray and love, the moral may be to try and inculcate that in our daily lives. Pick a sunday and feast on some of the finest foods. I had pick one in two months and binge on belgian beer or wines with some exotic foods that I probably wouldn't do on a working day. Not for the reason of calories, but more to avoid the frog-like-sluggishness in the post lunch period. Make way for God in your daily lives. Love. Be happy. I would probably add exercise, running and swimming. And one day, if you cant make a sense of everything that's going around, you give yourself a break. Introspect. You will probably find some answers and some you wont. And for the ones you don't, live live live because life is quite often your quest to seek something that you believe is missing. 

I hear the book is better so I shall read it. I am not sure whether everyone is going to like this one, but I was happy watching it. Its probably because I like to sit across a table, grab a beer and share someone's life story.

p.s. I think the movie was cut partially, sad sad people !